One Trick Pony


May 26, 2002

Another Way to Make History Interesting

Category: Uncategorized – Bernie Dodge – 10:45 am

You in 1905 is a page connected with yet another put-a-modern-family-back-in-time-public-TV program. This time they’re going back to Edwardian England, a familiar place to any Upstairs, Downstairs fan. The working assumption of the page is that in that era, your entire life was determined by your father’s occupation. So I bravely typed in my father’s occupation (unemployed) and learned about life for the 1905 English Bernie Dodge:

Education

You’ll manage to get away without going to school and will start work when you’re ten.

Career Prospects

You’ll have temporary jobs, none for more than six months as you keep having to take time out to rest your bad back. You’ll join a friendly society to help you out. You’ll take home a few shillings for a week’s hard work and will have to make sure it lasts a long time.

Leisure Time

You’ll drink methylated spirits - it’s the only alcohol you can afford at 4p a pint.

Living Conditions

You’ll share various rooms in lodgings with other men. Some weeks you won’t be able to afford to pay the rent and you’ll be evicted.

Marital Relations

You won’t marry but you’ll make up for it by spending time with girls from the street.

World War One

You’ll try to sign up to join the army when the war starts and will be rejected on medical grounds after physical examination.

Needless to say, I’m glad to have been born in a different time and place.